I haven’t the slightest idea what made me start thinking about the “Red Hat Society”. Is that still a thing? I bet it is.

I always thought it was so odd. There seems to be a theme based on Jenny Joseph’s poem. Which, as I understood it, was about how great it was going to be to stop feeling the need to conform.

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat that doesn’t go, and doesn’t suit me,

So they all get together and wear whatever-they-want purple outfits and red hats. If you don’t wear that, you won’t fit in. Oh, and typically, the red hats have some sort of purple trim. After all, they’re made for the Red Hat ladies, and they should go with the dresses, right? Oooookay.

I’m unlikely to ever belong to a Red Hat Society. So here’s my version of the poem:

When I am an old woman I shall wear whatever-the-fork-I-want.
With a side of don’t-give-a-shirt-about-bras-or-shaved-legs.
And I shall spend all my money on yarn, and more yarn.
And butter.
And I will stay in the house by myself and crochet all the time.
Or go somewhere and crochet. Whichever.

Hmmm… I think I must already be old.
Ain’t it great?